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[personal profile] ninevirtues
Ladies and Gentlemen, I had a conversation with a potential date that went so badly, it was comical.
After a few initial sentences, I volunteered that I was only in Omaha for a few months.

PD: "Well, the only thing I'd be interested in you for then is casual sex."

It took me several weeks of thinking about the conversation to come up with the Right Answer to that remark, which was to squeal "Eeeeeeewwwwwww!" and hang up the phone immediately. In retrospect, it was clear in that moment that I was speaking to someone from another planet, one where they have no tact, no social skills, and no desire to understand women.

Did I do that? No, I tried Logic, which worked about as well as you'd think it would, which is to say, not at all.

Me: "Uh..... why would I want that?" (Let's see if I can get him to walk in my shoes for a moment.)

PD: "Well, you've seen my picture, and I've seen your picture." (Unfortunately, his picture was not the inducement he seemed to think it would be. And even then-- I don't sleep with jerks. Jerkiness breeds true. Better not risk it. ;-)

When I told him that wasn't an arrangement that would interest me, he started to argue the point. (I believe I'm now permanently tarred as naive and intolerant for refusing his offer.) Worse yet, when I said something, I had to wait a long second for my sentence to register with him and for him to formulate a reply.

That's right, not only was I engaging in a ridiculous argument with someone from another planet, I was doing so at half speed. Worse yet, he was so firmly convinced of the rightness of his own point of view that I was losing the argument.

Note to self: Next time, squeal "Eeeeeeewwwwwww!" and hang up promptly. It's the only way to go.

Date: 2005-02-05 09:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] browse.livejournal.com
Dang, I'm gonna have to try that line. "Well, the only thing I'd be interested in you for then is casual sex." Wait a minute. "only"? Now wait a minute, let's not start denigrating casual sex!

Are you sure you wanna try that line?

Date: 2005-02-05 09:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ninevirtues.livejournal.com

You can see how well it worked for him.

:-D

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