Go to the local OSH looking for blueberry plants.
Score! Two gallon blueberry plant. I win! Tag says, "Acidic soil pH 4.5 to 5.5. Do not use nitrate fertilizer."
Ask the teenaged clerk, "What kind of soil (gestures to wall-o-soil-samples) can I put around these plants to make the pH good?"
"It says here, use a soil mix that is 60% conifer, 20% loam, 20% peat. Which of these soils will work for that?"
"Conifer? What's that?"
(Sigh. She's a teenager, not a college professor. She's doing her best. Patience, DeCamp. Patience.)
"It pretty much means pine tree."
After studying the wall of soil choices for ten minutes and failing to interest me in the pine bark mulch, she gets her contemporary (a male teenager who knows about as much as she does.) He can't help either. I wait patiently. There has to be an experienced person working here, and if I wait patiently, they'll eventually arrive at the conclusion that they should go and get him to answer my question.
Then the experienced guy walks in. He has fifty years on his co-workers, and he says, "You want to acidify the soil you have now. Use THIS (leads me to the soil acidifier) and test it with THIS (points at the soil test kit)."
"That's what you need. Any other questions?"
"Yeah, it says not to use a nitrate fertilizer. How should I pick one?"
"Get a 10-10-10 fertilizer."
"I have fish emulsion, will that do it?"
"Yeah. Just check that it's 10-10-10."